


The Vor Ideal

by Gwynne



Category: Vorkosigan Saga - Lois McMaster Bujold
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-09
Updated: 2018-12-09
Packaged: 2019-09-14 18:05:06
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,411
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16917714
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gwynne/pseuds/Gwynne
Summary: Once again the Rear-Admiral rises to the occasion.





	The Vor Ideal

The Vor Ideal

I thought I was safe, Markov, staying on the outskirts of the mob during the Emperor’s last big do – he was celebrating some birthday or anniversary or the opening of an envelope or whatever - anyway, there I was, safe as I thought, hovering as far from my wife’s sister as possible – the one that looks like a warthog, not the one that does something in the Science Institute, although she’s hardly safe either, she blows things up for a living. Apparently that doesn’t mean she works with balloons, although it can’t be explosives, you’d never let a woman near explosives, they’re explosive enough without help, as I often note when dealing with my dear wife. Anyway, there I was, minding my own business, when suddenly an Emperor loomed at me. I stepped back in self-preservation and bounced off the Empress, which is actually a rather delightful experience, but not when the Emperor is right beside you. And before I could recover from the shock he’d dropped another job on me. ‘Just the man I need’ he says, ‘you have such a clear view of the essentials’. So since I didn’t want my essentials to get a seeing-to by a few unsympathetic armsmen I bowed and thanked him for yet another rotten task. Although not in those words, of course, a man needs to be tactful when dealing with the Emperor. Especially when he has a handful of Empress at the time.

So, my latest job. The Emperor wants to fix the Vor. Of course, he didn’t say it like that, but that’s what he meant. All that trouble with Count Vorbataille’s heir – some dirty dealings there, he tried to kill an Auditor’s wife or something – and Theo Vormercier stealing from the military – they hushed that up too, but he was his uncle’s heir until his uncle cooked up a few sprogs in those replicant thingys – causing a lot of problems, they are – and there’s a whole lot more of them, useless heirs and younger sons and nephews, and daughters too, doing nothing and giving us all a bad name. The Emperor’s sick of them, he’s considered either abolishing Vor entirely, or making everyone Vor. I told him he couldn’t do that – imagine the confusion with phone books, electoral rolls, etc. Plus he’d never get it through the Council of Counts. They’ll hold on to their privileges like a dog with a bone. Or like a warthog with whatever they hunt – have I mentioned my wife’s sister? She’s staying with us while her husband’s away – he does something or other for ImpSec. Probably volunteered for a suicide mission just to get some peace. 

Anyway, the Emperor has decided we need to ‘define the Vor ideal’, meaning put a bit of backbone into the louts, layabouts and strumpets of the younger generation. Town clowns indeed – we’d have been ashamed to have nothing to do with ourselves. In my day we went from school to the Academy, or some other suitable officer training establishment if we didn’t have High Vor enough parents, and then on to a full and satisfying career shooting at people. Nothing like the military for teaching you how to get on with each other – well, the ones you’re not shooting at anyway. After a few decades you really settle in and know where you belong. 

But the yoof today, disgusting the lot of them, they actually have to be taught how to be a normal person. Or a normal Vor, at least. Do your military service, drink anything they put in front of you, marry a good woman and make more Vor: that’s the Vor ideal. Serve the Emperor, serve Barrayar, be loyal and shoot whatever he tells you to. Then drink till the floor hits you, then sober up and do it again. Simple.

But of course he needs more details than that. And apparently it has to include women. No idea why, I mean we need them of course, but there’s no reason to make a fuss about it. Have Vor babies, don’t get close to any male but your husband, and keep your Vorfemme knife nice and sharp just in case. Simple. Or it used to be.

So, The Vor Ideal.

No more of those useless layabouts and outright criminals – that’s disgusting behaviour from a Vor. Stealing, and from the Empire itself like Theo Vormercier – just imagine what old Pierre le Sanguinaire or Piotr Vorkosigan would have done to them. I don’t even want to imagine what they’d have done to Louis Vorbataille, trying to kill an Auditor’s wife. Time to clear out the cesspit and remind some of these young ones what Vor really means. 

Well, loyalty to the Emperor is the first thing. And to the Empress too, if we’re including women, but best do that from a safe distance, for your own personal safety. Just do whatever the Emperor tells you to do, don’t try to kill him, avoid starting a civil war… that’s about it. Loyalty. 

Next, do something. That’s what the Emperor wants from the new generation. Of course, the best thing is to join the military, that’s what Vor are for after all, but in this degenerate age some of our young people actually want to do something different. Can’t see why, I mean shooting at people is a nice simple way to show your support for a strong and peaceful Empire. 

But for those who, weirdly, don’t want to do a perfectly normal Vor activity, they can do something else. Anything really, just so long as it keeps them busy, and contributes to the Empire in some way. Getting a good education is a start, they can go to some University or College, and study something useful. Those Science boffins come up with helpful new explosives, or there’s engineering – plenty of opportunities to make better weapons or ship engines, or there’s medicine – we can always use more doctors to patch up the ones who miss on their first shot and take a few hits. Even women can help – we can always use more nurses, or people knitting extra bandages or something. There’s other course at universities, so be careful or you’ll end up as a lawyer – totally slimy bunch – or doing something artistic – we had a name for that in the old days – or in politics – even worse names for that. Just stick to the useful courses and you can’t go wrong.

Some Vor don’t have to work because they’re rich, or thick, or women. They can devote their time to charity work, looking after whatever it is that charities look after. A warthog rescue centre would be a good start. 

A few of them, especially the High Vor, might help run a family business or estate. Or District. But they have to be really doing it, not just playing pretend as a way to skive off and get drunk. A decent Vor can get drunk and still hold down a job and a career. Show up, take it seriously, and do the work. None of those layabouts who depend on their staff to do all the work. Disgraceful behaviour.

Of course, women are a special case, they’re not like us. You can’t expect girls to spend time on work or study when they should be finding a husband. I told my wife that it’s time our granddaughter stopped this silliness about University – five space maths and applied spatial something-or-other, no idea what all those numbers mean, I’m sure they’re just for decoration. Time she stopped fussing about getting a PhD and thought about getting a husband, I told her. Look at your grandma, she found herself a Vor officer, settled down and had babies. None of that PhD nonsense for her. My granddaughter told me she’d never find anyone like me – it’s good to know I’m appreciated. She also said something about her grandma being a successful novelist. Well, I know my wife scribbles things down now and then, but it’s just her little hobby. A woman needs something to do to occupy all that free time they have. 

Anyway, women. Raising the new generation of Vor is an important job, and hopefully they’ll produce something better than the layabouts and idlers we see now. And if they’re not working outside the home they can do charity work – knitting things for the poor, or something. That’ll teach them to be poor. 

Now Vor women in the old days, they were different. Those Vorfemme knives could slice an enemy just as fast as they cleansed the gene pool. I remember my old great-aunt, fearsome woman. Buried five husbands. And two of them weren’t even hers. And one of them wasn’t dead. Yes, women in the old days, they were iron to the core. Not like the women these days, wearing those Komarran trousers and bouncing around flaunting themselves. A man doesn’t know where to look these days, disgraceful it is. 

The Emperor’s put a time limit on it, too – by the age of thirty they have to be able to show that they’re living to the ideals of the Vor or they won’t be Vor any more. Thin the herd, improve the breeding stock. Works with cattle, and anything that works on cows will work on the Vor. There’ll be some kind of Vor-board set up, all Vor have to report in by age thirty to show they’re Voring away usefully. Frankly I think anyone who fails should be shot, but in this weakened age they’ll just lose their Vor-hood. 

Of course, being convicted of a crime will get them wiped from the Vor rolls as well, unless it’s a perfectly understandable little difficulty related to alcohol, or piloting a lightflyer, or both. 

There’ll be a few squeals, but not enough to stop this. The Council of Counts will love the idea of making Vor strong again, all the Vor who actually do something will be fine with it, and nobody likes town clowns anyway; younger sons are just for insurance, it’ll do them good to get out and do something useful. 

Frankly there’s some Proles who’d qualify long before those Vor town clowns. Maybe it’s time the Emperor added a few more to the Vor list – the old Emperors used to do it all the time. 

That’s the main idea of it all, anyway. Just check it through, Markov, and shoot it off to the Emperor’s secretary. 

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Reshaping the Vor Ideal for a New Era

An Imperial Discussion Paper from Rear Admiral Stefan Vorlakial

Due to several unfortunate events recently, it has become necessary to redefine the role and ideals of those who carry Vor in their name. This is a privilege and a duty, and all Vor should be held to a high standard, and achieve that standard, to remain part of this special and important class within the Empire. Honour and integrity should be of the highest importance to a Vor.

The prime duty of all Vor is loyalty to the Emperor and the Imperial family, and by extension to the Empire itself. Working for the good of the Empire, preserving peace, strength and positive progress for all, should be the ideal for all Vor. 

It is important that Vor pursue a rewarding and productive life and career. Traditionally almost all Vor males focussed on a military career, and many Vor – male and female – still do so, to the great benefit of the Empire, but this is no longer their only option.

Other career options are available. Universities and colleges have many courses, and there are rewarding careers in fields such as the sciences, engineering and medicine. Young men and women can also look to other areas, such as education, history, law, the arts, finance, politics, and more, depending on their talents and interests.

Some Vor won’t need to look for gainful employment due to their family situation; they may be supported by family trust funds, or they could be young women involved in home duties while they raise children. There are still many opportunities for them to be involved in helping others; wealthier Vor can sponsor and even run charities, while others can give their time and talents in volunteer work. This all helps to strengthen society, and the Empire itself.

Young men and women may work in a family business, or help to run an estate or even a whole District. This is an important role, but it must be shown to be genuine. Many Districts would benefit from the focus and energy of younger members of the family giving their time and attention. 

As has already been state above, raising a family is in itself an important contribution to the Empire, and young children benefit greatly from the time, care and attention of a loving mother. Many young women choose to take time from their careers to devote some years to this important duty. Even so, they will be able to find time and opportunities for some volunteer and charity work, which will give them an outlet for their skills, and be a good role model for their children. A strong Vor mother will raise children who live up to the Vor ideal. We have the examples of many outstanding Vor women from history, who raised a family while also performing many other important duties. 

A special board will be set up to monitor the progress of young Vor. By age thirty they will be required to show, and prove, that they have engaged in a career or other positive activity for the good of the Empire. In most cases this will require little more than filling in a form and providing proof of employment. Those who don’t meet the required standards will no longer be entitled to use Vor as part of their name. This is not meant to be a penalty, it’s simply a recognition that they do, or do not, meet the required standard. 

Any Vor involved in serious criminal activity will also lose the privilege of being Vor. 

It is expected that all Vor will welcome this reminder of the high ideals by which they live, and their importance to the Empire. 

In the future the Emperor may also consider rewarding some outstanding Proles who have done great service to the Empire, and who display all the features of the highest of Vor ideals, to the Vor class. 

We live to serve the Empire.

Rear-Admiral Stefan Vorlakial.


End file.
